1.An Irish Lass A Seamstress Fair
Made Shamrocks for her hair
She Stitched and Weaved
That Thread so Tight
Everyone Knew the Lass on Sight
There once was a girl name of Cherry
Whose spare room was getting quite scary!
There were patterns galore
And she'd just ordered more
A huge lot of Vogue and DuBarry!.
The patterns are packaged for shipping
There are so many they’re slipping
The Postmaster Sighs
As the pile is high
The Post Office counter is tipping!
I do not like the new activity feed
I would'nt like it with a bucket of mead
It looks horrible, even with the boxes
I couldn't like it, even with foxes
It makes my eyes crazy
And Im not very lazy
I like to see my activity, Sam I am
There once was an old lady from EC
Who liked to sell patterns on Etsy
But she can't remember
What she sold in September
'Cause in Alzheimers she's up to the Z.
About the new activity feed
Its causing me to bleet and bleed
Etsy quit changing
What didn't need arranging
And please let my circle be freed
I really do like to be sewing
and my pattern supply is still growing.
I jump out of bed
for my needle and thread
My creative juices have started flowing!
So with paper and fabric and pins
my work with the pattern begins
I measure and write
all through the night
I must get this done for the twins!
My project is now complete
I tried hard to make it look neat.
I cut the loose thread -
and it's now on my bed -
and the dresses are simply sew sweet!
There once was a sewer so fearless
She only sewed Demorest and Peerless.
With Pictorial Review
She wouldn't make do.
And DuBarry left her quite cheerless.
There once was a girl who pattered
Because buying patterns to her mattered
When she’d look through the scores
Of patterns and more
Her wallet came away battered!
There once was a young Lass
Who bought vintage patterns enmasse
When she made a score
She just yearned for more
For a good lot she could not let pass
Patterns for sale me O my
I wonder which ones I should buy
Lovely patterns galore
To sell in my store
I love me some patterns, can't lie
Pattern pieces, they’re wrinkled and smashed,
Some notches and darts, they are gashed
As you count and you sort
And find great team support
Be proud that these beauties weren’t trashed.
13.My husband can’t hear the TV
He blames this dilemma on me
Pattern pieces, they rustle
As I refold and tussle
“More factory folds!” is his plea.
14.Vintage patterns are in my garage
So many, it’s quite a barrage
They’re here and they’re there,
They’re most everywhere,
When I’m done sorting I need a massage.
15.Vintage patterns fill boxes and drawers,
Enough to stock ten Etsy stores
Are there maybe too many?
No! Some cost but a penny
We live for those great thrift store scores.
I run like Flynn
For Patterns are Sin
They are stacked in bins
To the stars with Pins
There once was a lass from Nantucket
Who cried when she kicked over her bucket
It was filled to the brim
with pins, thread and trim
and she whined that this really does sucketh
Oh, there once was a young lass from Nantucket
who scaled estate sales with a bucket
gathering ole' patterns and fabric in mass
with delight in the score, but too pay so much more,
would clearly be a day that did sucketh!